2/16/11
Dear Jehovah God,
As for Your sacrificial gifts, we sacrifice the flesh and eat it, but You have taken no delight in them. Now You will remember our iniquity, and punish us for our sins; we will return to Egypt.
We will go with their flocks and herds to seek You, but we will not find You, You have withdrawn from us.
As for Your sacrificial gifts, I sacrifice the flesh and eat it, but You have taken no delight in me, no delight in my sacrifice. Now You remember my iniquity, and punish me for my sins; I will return to Egypt.
With what shall I come to You and bow myself before You on high? Shall I come to You with burnt offerings, with yearling calves? Do You take delight in thousands of rams, in ten thousand rivers of oil? Shall I present my first-born for my rebellious acts, the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?
Am sorry I sacrifice the flesh and eat it, but You take no delight in them. I know You remember my iniquity. I know You will punish me for my sins. I am sorry for my sins. I do not want to sin. I do not want to return to Egypt. Please do not make me return to Egypt. I know I will go with my flocks and herds to seek You, but I will not find You. Oh, please let me find You! Please do not withdraw from me. I am sorry I hurt You and that I cannot stop hurting You.
What do You want from me? What am I supposed to be doing? What gift can I bring You? What gifts can I present You that You would delight in?
Then we will call on You, that You will not answer; we will see You diligently, but we shall not find You. And we will call on wisdom, but she will not answer; we will seek her diligently, but we shall not find her.
So when I spread out my hands in prayer, You will hide Your eyes from me, yes, even though I multiply prayers, You will not listen. My hands are covered with blood.
When we fast, You are not going to listen to our cry; and when we offer burnt offering and grain offering, You were not going to accept them. Rather You are going to make an end of us by the sword, famine, and pestilence.
Son of man, do I see what we are doing, the great abominations which the house of Israel are committing here, that You should be from Your sanctuary? But yet I will see still greater abominations.
I call on You. I seek You diligently. I call on wisdom and seek her diligently. I spread out my hands in prayer. I know I multiply prayers. I am sorry my hands are covered with blood.
So I will fast for a little while at least and perhaps You listen to my cry. What gift can I give You that You will accept? What gift can I give You that You will accept me? I am sorry for You that You are going to put an end of us by the sword, famine, and pestilence because I know we hurt You. You have to.
Days Jehovah my God, I want to see what we are doing, the great abominations which we are committing. I want to know Your pain, Your thoughts and feelings, Your yearning and I want to see our abominations. Please let me in. Please do not hide Yourself from me. Amen, Amen, & Amen.